Good, Good Father

Not long after I moved to the Washington DC area, which happens to have many wealthy towns surrounding it, I was browsing the children’s section of a store and I overheard a child ask his father about buying something. I remember the dad saying, “You can have anything you want.” I felt a little shocked by those words – trying to imagine taking a child into a toy store and letting the kid get whatever he or she wanted.

That father might seem like a good dad for giving his kid whatever he wants – but can there be too much granted to a child? Is a good father the one who says something like:

I’ll buy you whatever you want at the store

I’ll let you eat anything you want

You can have any car you want when you’re 16

I won’t give you any rules or boundaries

If you’ve spent much time with young children, you probably agree that those aren’t wise ideas.

When I was in college, I worked at a daycare. I remember one sunny day I took my class of seven 2-year-olds outside to play on the soccer field next door. Several children took off in different directions as I attempted to corral them back together. It wasn’t fun for me as I tried to catch the runaway toddlers on a large field. I realized that we all had more fun when we had boundaries – when they played on their fenced-in playground and I could rest and watch them.

Then there was the child who allowed me a peek into her mind – she seemed to think that her parents saying “no” meant that she was bad. Any logical person would say that a parent saying “no more TV” or “no more candy” doesn’t mean the kid is bad! They just know what’s best!

But have you ever felt like that kid, when looking at God the Father? I have. “God must not like me as much as my friend, because He has given her _____.” I think that I must be undeserving because He has not given me that same gift.

That is such an untrue view of God! I have come to realize that God saying “no” or “not yet” does not indicate that I am bad or that He doesn’t love me – instead it means that He sees me like a father sees his child – wisely giving me boundaries.

God is the ultimate Good Father. He loves us more than any dad has ever loved his child. There are times when He’s extravagant in His gifts toward us, but in those moments when He’s only allowing us to play on the fenced-in playground, or when He’s only allowing us one toy at the store or saying we have enough right now, we must remember that He’s looking at the big picture of our lives.

He’s concerned with how we manage what we have. Do I need to take home everything in the store?

He’s paying attention to our finances. Am I able to handle a larger amount of money wisely?

He’s looking 5 or 10 years down the road – He knows what the future holds – so He can say “slow down, wait, stop, or no.”

A song we’ve sung often at our church and one I’ve listened to and found myself singing many times in recent weeks is “Good, Good Father” by Chris Tomlin (listen here). The words of the song include:

You’re a good, good Father, it’s who you are
And I’m loved by You, it’s who I am
You are perfect in all of your ways

Sometimes we’re going to sing those words with tears pouring out of our eyes because God is reaching into a deep part of us with a perfect Father’s love. Sometimes we might get choked up on the “you are perfect in all of your ways” when we’re wondering how THIS situation in our life is something He considers perfect.

But He is the ultimate good Father – He’s not going to dump too much good (or too much bad) on us. He IS perfect in all of His ways.

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Hi, I’m Betsy, and it seems that I couldn't decide which blog to post this on because my images have different websites marked on them! Oops! :) Right now you're on my personal blog: www.lovethatbetsy.com. I talk about hope during infertility on my book page www.hopeduringinfertility.com (check out the "infertility topics" section). You can find years of my writing stored over on www.chixpartyoffive.com under the tag "Betsy" - and there you can find blog posts by some of my dearest friends as well. 

Right now I live in the Washington, D.C. area with my husband, Mike. We have been married since 2008. We enjoy exploring new cities together on foot, eating at our favorite Italian restaurants, and doing life as a team. I published my first book Embracing Hope During Infertility in January 2015. You can learn more about me here. I invite you to connect with me by following my Hope During Infertility Facebook page or my Betsy Herman, Writer Facebook page. Thanks so much for reading my posts!