For the past 7 years, my husband and I chose to believe and declare that God is good and that He is faithful - even in the barren season. My husband was the primary force behind this thinking - he is optimistic and continued to point me toward God and God's goodness during some very difficult years. We continued to believe that God had said we would have children one day even when it didn't look likely. Like a t-shirt I love to wear that says "Choose Joy" we did our best to choose joy even during some rough years.
During those 7 years we were unable to become pregnant, although there were many prayers and prophetic words, and we pursued all the medical treatment that we felt comfortable with and could afford.
Throughout years, I reflected on the announcement that the angel Gabriel brought to Mary, the mother of Jesus. He told her that she would bear the Son of God miraculously because, "Even your cousin Elizabeth, who was old and barren, is in her 6th month of pregnancy." I love that God announced the coming of Jesus with a miracle pregnancy after years of barrenness! John was the forerunner for Jesus even in the womb!
Although everyone knows me as Betsy, my real name is Elizabeth, and I clung to Luke 1:36 which says that even Elizabeth who was barren is now pregnant.
Last fall, the fertility specialist told me it was very unlikely that we'd get pregnant without assistance, due to our age and history of not getting pregnant despite years of trying. We began pursuing some fertility treatments, but God had other plans. During a month with no medical intervention God said "it's time!" He said "YES!" and our baby is due the first week of April! (Here's more of the story.)
Two scriptures that I've thought about a lot during these past few months are:
You turned my wailing (mourning) into dancing, you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. Lord my God, I will praise You forever! (Psalm 30:11-12 NIV)The moment that we discovered that we had a baby on the way, it was as if God erased the grief and sorrow that had hovered over us for years. The pressure to become pregnant was no longer there. The stress and worry disappeared. Sure, we've had moments of worry that this baby will thrive, but God has reassured us over and over again that He's got this, and the doctors say everything looks good.
Many who become pregnant after infertility or loss struggle with fear and anxiety during pregnancy. I've had moments of feeling that way, and physically I haven't felt as well as I'd like, but I believe that because we chose joy during the long, hard wait, our sorrow instantly turned to joy when this pregnancy began. My husband and I had set ourselves up for joy because that's how we positioned ourselves during infertility. I'm not sure these words make as much sense as I want them to, but it's a concept I hope to explore more in further writing.
One more passage that has been key to us during our wait is Psalm 92:14-15. We've pondered the NIV version as we've realized that we'll be older than most first-time parents. "They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green, proclaiming, 'The Lord is upright; he is my Rock, and there is no wickedness in Him.'" I recently read it in the Amplified Version where it captures many translations. This is our foundation as we become older-than-most first time parents!
Growing in grace, they will still thrive and bear fruit and prosper in old age. They will flourish and be vital and fresh (rich in trust and love and contentment). They are living memorials to declare that the Lord is upright and faithful to His promises. He is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in Him. (Psalm 92:14-15 AMP)There is so much more I can say as I continue to make sense of the story God is writing in our growing family, so if you're interested, subscribe to my occasional emails by using the form below!
Here is our pregnancy announcement: http://www.hopeduringinfertility.com/jesus-said-yes-announcement/.
More of our story: http://www.hopeduringinfertility.com/our-story-part-2/
Keep following along here at www.lovethatbetsy.com and http://www.hopeduringinfertility.com/infertility-topics/, since more posts will be coming soon. God willing, I'll be publishing some books in the near future. The best way to keep up with my new writing is now an occasional email from me! Here's how you can sign up:
Hi, I’m Betsy, and I live in the Washington, D.C. area with my husband, Mike. We have been married since 2008, and look forward to the arrival of our first baby in 2018! We enjoy exploring new cities together on foot and doing life as a team.
I write because I feel called and I enjoy it, and I hope that my words point you toward God! My first book, Embracing Hope During Infertility is intended to infuse hope into your heart! My second book, although written for children, will point you toward the goodness of God, even in the darkest times.
You can learn more about me here. I would love for you to connect with me by following my Hope During Infertility Facebook page or my Betsy Herman, Writer Facebook page. I’m also on Instagram and Twitter as @lovethatbetsy.
Thanks so much for reading this post!
Thanks so much for reading this post!
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