Our baby daughter's life so far is a testimony of joy - her arrival after many years of infertility was joyous, and she's usually a happy little one, but even a person who seems to be naturally happy and joyful has her moments of sorrow.
As she's getting older and more curious, she's showing more moments of disappointment and frustration. However, during her first year outside of the womb, nothing made her upset quite like being strapped into her car seat for a long ride. Many times she would cry in a way that sounded like her heart was breaking, other times she sounded just plain angry. In that moment, she clearly did not like her present circumstances.
Oh, how often do I feel like that? Crying, angry, heartbroken, disappointed, because I don't like my current circumstances. How often did I feel like that while waiting for my baby?
When we feel like our situation is out of our control, we feel trapped, leaving us feeling angry or simply sad.
Often, especially when she was a little younger, as a meltdown in the car began, I would say, "Don't cry, instead let's use our voices to sing songs to Jesus." The sweetest sound often follows, the sound of her cries turning into a loud "aaaaaaaaah," as she begins to sing. I sing as well, and we sing every song we can think of about Jesus, including "Jesus Loves Me," and "Jesus, Name Above All Names," and whatever words we can remember in the song that says "Jesus, You make the darkness tremble."
As she's getting older and more curious, she's showing more moments of disappointment and frustration. However, during her first year outside of the womb, nothing made her upset quite like being strapped into her car seat for a long ride. Many times she would cry in a way that sounded like her heart was breaking, other times she sounded just plain angry. In that moment, she clearly did not like her present circumstances.
Oh, how often do I feel like that? Crying, angry, heartbroken, disappointed, because I don't like my current circumstances. How often did I feel like that while waiting for my baby?
When we feel like our situation is out of our control, we feel trapped, leaving us feeling angry or simply sad.
This baby who hates long drives in the car also loves to sing. She has not yet figured out how to sing many words or to sing on key, but she sings wholeheartedly. And loudly. I hear her singing out loud during praise and worship at church - even when the congregation isn't! She loves to sing along with me when I make up a ditty - we sing together about going to sleep, about drinking milk, and riding on mommy's back in the baby carrier. We play our ukuleles together, singing songs to Jesus as loud as we can. She will sing herself to sleep sometimes, loud enough for everyone to hear.
A phrase I've taught her at a young age is "singing songs to Jesus."
"We're going to church where we'll sing songs to Jesus," I tell her on Sunday mornings.
When she's having a hard time sleeping I suggest we "sing songs to Jesus."
Often, especially when she was a little younger, as a meltdown in the car began, I would say, "Don't cry, instead let's use our voices to sing songs to Jesus." The sweetest sound often follows, the sound of her cries turning into a loud "aaaaaaaaah," as she begins to sing. I sing as well, and we sing every song we can think of about Jesus, including "Jesus Loves Me," and "Jesus, Name Above All Names," and whatever words we can remember in the song that says "Jesus, You make the darkness tremble."
A lesson I'm learning from my tiny daughter is to turn my sorrow into joy by singing praise instead of indulging sadness. Trust me, I'm not always good at it, especially when sadness is combined with tiredness or hormonal stuff. But the sound of my baby's sorrow turning into joy is not easy to forget.
I remember a car trip of my own a few years ago, when I was feeling overwhelmed with grief because of my barren womb. Listening to worship music only gave me a soundtrack to cry along with. Not until I began to use my voice to sing did my attitude begin to shift toward joy.
There is something powerful about putting on a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair (Isaiah 61).
It's hard to sing praise to Jesus when you're sad. My baby girl makes it look easier than it feels for me, but she reminds me to choose joy, even when my circumstances are out of my control and not what I want them to be. I can choose to sing anyway!
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Need some fresh songs to point you in this direction? Lately I've been listening to the Victory album by Bethel, with the first two songs on repeat. Go listen to "Raise a Hallelujah" and "Goodness of God."
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Hi, I’m Betsy, and I live in the Washington, D.C. area with my husband, Mike. We have been married since 2008, and we welcomed our first baby in 2018. You can read about our long road to parenthood in these blog posts, or in my first book, Embracing Hope During Infertility.
Seasons is my book written for children, it will point all readers toward the goodness of God – especially in the darkest times. Most recently I published a book for new authors or people who dream of writing a book. I hope that Write Your Story helps you finish your book as well! I have another book in the works… so make sure you follow me on social media to learn more about it.
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Seasons is my book written for children, it will point all readers toward the goodness of God – especially in the darkest times. Most recently I published a book for new authors or people who dream of writing a book. I hope that Write Your Story helps you finish your book as well! I have another book in the works… so make sure you follow me on social media to learn more about it.
I would love for you to connect with me by following my Hope During Infertility Facebook page or my Betsy Herman, Writer Facebook page. I’m also on Instagram.
1 comment:
Oh Betsy, this is so true! Thanks for posting this amazing article which reminds us ALL to raise our voices in praise. Hugs to your sweet baby Rachel who reminds us to raise a Hallelujah unabashedly!
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